How to Keep Fit--- the Easy Way

Out for a walk...

I just came back from an hour of walk with my pre-schooler--- she on her trike and me on foot, sweating under a sweater and a leather jacket. The day is gray with tiny drizzles of rain. (Or mist? I'm not so sure.) So I thought a leather jacket will be warm enough, but it got too warm as I walked.

Walking is one of my easy (and enjoyable) way to keep fit, which I do twice in a week. I do other things, which I'm going to share with you in a moment. But why keep fit?

When I was younger, I kept fit to stay in shape, but I have more reasons than that now that I'm older. There are the body pains that usually go away after a few minutes of stretching and a cloudy mind that gets its dusting with every move and stride I make.

Keeping fit is essential to our bodies especially to those who are not getting any younger any more. And we don't get it by simply reading about some people who look fit and young because of their strict exercise regimen. But for many of us, it is a struggle to just simply get up and get moving, much more to do it daily.

I understand this struggle. With four kids to care and look after, a household to keep, work and interests and dreams to reach, I sometimes neglect this much-needed routine just to  have time for other things. Which I'm guilty to say I am more enthusiastic about. But having a fit body and a sound mind is important in every aspect of life as a parent, as a spouse, and in our relationship with God.

Listing down things I do, keeps them in mind more readily. Here's what I do in a week to keep fit.


1. Do the walk.

The ideal way for me to get the most out of a walk is going by myself. However, it always doesn't happen that way. So, I walk with kids. Sometimes, a kid or two. I invite the Honey to walk with me. And I do a prayer-walk around my neighborhood area or somewhere different from my usual beaten path.

I love to walk where I haven't walked before. That's why my husband is often astonished to learn that I have been in some places in our city where he hasn't brought me before. As I've mentioned, I go walking at least twice a week.

2. Dance to the Music!

On other days that I cannot go walking, I dance for 30 minutes to Zumba videos at least three times a week. The following videos in Youtube is enough to pump up some energy for me for the day, as well as, get my rusty joints stretched before I have my breakfast. Try this 15-minute Zumba video,  4-minute body toning video and a stretching video. I love that the first video is in French, and so easy and fun!

I also get my kids moving, especially when they are caught indoors because of nasty weather, by getting them do some kids zumba. And to get them enthusiastic, I move along with them to music such as "Gummy Bear" or "Hickory-Dickory-Dock", which my little pre-schooler loves. (She's a great dancer!)

3. Get soil-dirty hands.

Digging in the garden for even just thirty minutes burns 200 to 400 calories! And that includes pulling weeds and planting.  Planting vegetables have an added bonus of putting food on the table--- the healthy ones.

I have to pull weeds or our yard will resemble a beautiful Russian forest, complete with a big, brown bear. I try to get the kids in on the activity but the most they can give is five minutes, except for an empathetic Angelika, who cannot bear the thought of her mom with so much to do and no one to help her. Anyhow, working in the yard is a good bonding moment and families should do it often, working together.

4. Playtime! 

I'm not talking about video or computer games. Playtime should be with traditional games or sports. Perhaps we, adults, should be reminded how to have fun again with something as simple as playing tag or playing with a ball. There's nothing more rewarding than playing with the kids and nothing more fun while burning calories.

When I'm out of ideas, I just race the kids to the next lamp post or play a simple game of football or basketball using unlikely objects as a goal or a basket. As they are growing older, I introduce little-by-little traditional Filipino games--- the ones I played when I was a snooty-nosed urchin. There is "Seven-seven-up", "Patintero", "Luksong tinik", "Tumba Lata", "Piko". Aside from "Seven-seven-up" which we have mastered by far, we are still in the process of getting them down pat.

During winter, I roll around in the snow with them or have a snowball fight. Accordingly, minding kids and playing with them burns 300 to 600 calories.

5. Have fun with house chores. 

Ah, chores. Who likes them? Not me. But I've adopted the kids' attitude of fun, so I can get them done. And scrubbing or even just vacuuming has made me sweat so I guess I'm doing some sort of workout even if just a little bit. Even a moderate housecleaning gets a hundred to two hundred calories. In wintertime, shoveling some snow always guarantees a good workout even for just twenty minutes. In fact, ten minutes of shoveling snow will get you so warmed up you won't want to go back to the drab and boring indoors.

Not only are these activities good for keeping you fit without much thought... and maybe, effort, but they are also therapeutic. Walking always gets me back into a happy, calm mood. Dancing makes me laugh and do silly things without getting embarrassed. Digging in the dirt makes me feel human, knowing that I come from the ground. Playing keeps that youthful spirit in me. And doing chores? It keeps the house clean and having a clean house is bliss!

Whatever we do, let's do it as unto the Lord (Colossians 3:23) For if we do, we will benefit greatly out of it. God's blessings are poured to those who willingly obey Him and it is His desire that we will be fit and in good health. Finally...

"Beloved, I pray that you may prosper in all things 

and be in health, just as your soul prospers." 

(3 John 2)

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Keep it Simple

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Freedom and What to Do to Redeem Moments Lost in Anger

Russian meadows. Wide, open spaces to fly, to roam...

Raining again! Not much, but consistent. The whole day had been misty, though surprisingly, not dreary. There's something refreshing about rain after a couple of days of pure sunshine and clear, cloudless skies. In fact, it's balmy and soothing. It calms my spirit, inviting me to sit down from all the constant activity and whirling. I feel so relaxed, but not sleepy. Just that--- happy-calm.

Two days ago on June 12th, this is what I wrote...

The skies have cleared up! It is all clean and blue with no cloud in sight. Bright and warm and summery. I can see beach in my mind, complete with a beach umbrella as I stay in one place helping the kids take off one set of clothes into another, and wet clothes into dry ones, and then, again... and again. I can see melting ice cream in kids' hands... and smell salty air and the feel of grainy sand under my bottom. I can hear the kids' shrieks as the waves take up on their challenge to get them wet. This makes me smile.

This is such good news after a wearisome series of rain, when we had to stay home and huddle against the harsh and unrelenting wind.

So right away, we made the most of the day by going out and celebrate with the people of Russia for Russia Day. There was a military band performing, which we missed. But we had fun with what they left behind--- military stuff. We also looked at antique cars--- so stylish that I wish I know how to drive. In another part of the city, there were fire trucks and other utility trucks lined up for people to enjoy and kids to clamber around. I felt the pride and joy of the Russian people--- the freedom that I know was not given to them for free but were protected by the very lives of their forefathers, and the efforts that the people of this age are doing to make everyone's lives better.

And as I look on and celebrate, down in my heart I celebrate as a Filipino, as my country, despite of evil men who are trying to destroy it, see another day to celebrate Philippine Independence Day with freedom, and pride at the courage given and displayed through the lives of men and women who love the country--- then and now. There is nothing more I wish for my beloved Philippines but true independence and freedom to live their God-given lives. 

In fact, this is what I wish for everyone living in this planet Earth.

But as most of us know, freedom comes with a price and a responsibility. And there is nothing truer to this than when Jesus gave up His life to set us free from a life of sin and eventual death. He paid the price for our freedom. And for this, we have a responsibility to stay free. And He alone can do this for us when we give our lives back to Him. "Therefore if the Son makes you free, you shall be free indeed." (John 8:36).

It was for freedom that Christ set us free; 

therefore keep standing firm and do not be subject again to a yoke of slavery.

(Galatians 5:1)

* * * * *

Let me type again normally... I have left off on my last blogpost on the subject of parents losing their cool during moments of conflict and have even thought up some measures against totally blowing off. 

But what if we've blown it? Is there anything we can do? Because I sometimes do, try as I might, like the last scene with my daughter, Angelika. 

In moments like these, a mother can...

1. Forgive. Extend grace to the kids and to yourself. Oftentimes, it's harder for me to forgive myself. That's why a mother should stop beating herself up (mentally) and instead pray to redeem the lost moment. Repent. There's no forgiveness when there's no repentance. Then move on to asking God to help you on how to redeem the moment. In Scripture, all correction is redemptive by design--- whether to correct the child or the parent. Nothing is lost on God.

2. Say "Sorry" (and mean it!). Growing up, I've never heard my father apologize to us, his children. And I understand. Because in my parents' time, apologizing was thought up as a way of buckling down under your children and was seen as a quick way to lose their respect. However, being honest to our children shows them that we, parents, are humans and are flawed. Just like them, we make mistakes. In apologizing, we model how we, as humans, may fall several times, but by God's grace can rise up again.

So say it. Ask your kids for forgiveness. Take responsibility for your behavior, that they may also learn to take responsibility with theirs.

3. Tell and Show them you love them. After a tough moment of conflict, a child is emotionally beaten up and scarred. Start the healing right away with words that will remind your child of your love--- unconditionally. This will affirm her worth, because for a child, what matters most is what you think of her. Show affection. Hug. Physical touch zaps our brain into a loving mood, which is necessary after moments of anger.

4. Pray together.  Even when I'm still blowing steam and I can't seem to stop, even as the Holy Spirit is prompting me to, I usually would gather my child or kids together in a hug to pray my emotions out with me. They, in turn, would pray and see God's redeeming way.

In her book Child Guidance, Ellen White talked about the importance of prayer in a moment of crisis, "Reveal the love you have for your erring one. As you bow before God with your child, you will present before the sympathizing Redeemer His own words, “Suffer the little children to come unto me, and forbid them not; for of such is the kingdom of God.” (Mark 10:14). That prayer will bring angels to your side. Your child will not forget these experiences, and the blessing of God will rest upon such instruction, leading him to Christ. When children realize that their parents are trying to help them, they will bend their energies in the right direction" (CG, 253).

* * * * *

We are free. We are redeemed. There is no better way to be than to live this powerful truth as God's children and as parents to His little ones.

Alas! We live in an imperfect and sinful body. However, God has provided a way out through His Son. Let's take hold of His hand to give us strength over our weak selves and give us patience. Those who depend on Him  will "go from strength to strength" (Psalm 84:7).  

"Let (all) be taught that every mistake, every fault, every difficulty, conquered, becomes a steppingstone to better and higher things. It is through such experiences that all who have ever made life worth the living have achieved success" (E. White, Education, 295, 296).

And yes, only through Him. It won't be long when we get to sing "Worthy is the Lamb!", to the One who conquers for us.

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Ways (for a Mother) to Keep Calm

Status: In a Relationship

Makeover

Ways (for a Mother) to Keep Calm

Rain is dripping outside when all I really want to do is go out for a walk and breath in some fresh air. Having been inside all day, I feel caged with my mind busy with a million things and with no direction. And when I am in such a sorry state, it shows in how I treat my children.

I yell at them. If not, I can go on and on with, "See, what you did?" I get sarcastic with them. I disrespect, forgetting that they, too, have feelings.

Afterwards, I feel bad and guilty. I punish myself by telling myself how horrible a mother I am. And when I don't feel good, all those bad emotions spill out to my children, even with my best intentions. It's a vicious cycle.

Angelika came home today determined to tell me the truth about losing the R50-bill I gave her for bus fare in coming home from school. Instead, she walked home. She wanted to be honest with me and prayed hard that I won't be angry with her. Of course, I've also resolved to stay calm when my children endeavor to tell me the truth. But as I spoke to her about what happened, I felt that angry bile rising and my voice rising with it. Angelika stood with head bowed. With much control, which I didn't feel at that moment, I stopped my tirade and told her to excuse herself as a student was coming soon for a private class with me. She went to her room.

While I got busy, I couldn't stop reprimanding myself at what I did. Leaving everything, I purposefully went to the girls' room but found the door close. Angelika locks herself in whenever she's upset with anyone, and this time she was upset with me. It wasn't locked when I turned the doorknob and I found her sitting on the spare bed hugging her legs, but she moved out of that position right away. I know I've botched it. So I just looked her in the eyes and said, "I love you." There were questions in her eyes but she remained speechless. "I love you," I said again, then softly closed the door. Later, I felt like I should have hugged her or shown more affection.

After my class and my student was gone, she came down from her room and told me, "Mom, you said 'I love you' when you came to my room." I nodded. Then she added, "I love you more."

From this incident, I've learned that even as we blow off ourselves before our kids, it's not the end yet. We can redeem what we've lost. But before totally making an embarrassment of ourselves, we can take measures. Here are some ways...

Keep Calm

1. Breath. Often when I do my breathing, I say a prayer. I find it easier to keep perspective on what is going on when I do. While others count numbers, I count on God's promises. He said,

The Lord gives strength to his people. 

The Lord blesses his people with peace.

(Psalm 29:11)

Another way to use breathing to calm down, which I've learned from one of my classes while working for my MA Counseling, is to visualize breathing in goodness and exhaling the toxic emotions out, example: anger, worry, etc. Feel the muscles in your body, the nerves, the organs inside, the tiny parts like the toes, fingers and eyes, etc, and bid them calm down and relax.

2. Go out. Just like kids need the time and space outside without walls, parents need that same space and time. A change of environment and fresh air can do wonders to a mind and body going numb with so much emotions and activity going on.

3. Have a time-out. I don't see time-out as a way to discipline but to teach children life skills, most importantly, in managing emotions. A mother taking a time-out when emotions are escalating is not only stopping herself from blasting off into the hell-world of uncontrollable anger, but also modeling to her children on what to do when they are caught in the same situation with peers, family and other people.

As long as it is safe to do so, retreat to a safer place alone. Whatever you do, whether to listen to music or take a walk or lie down on the floor alone while staring at the ceiling or read the Bible and talk to God, give yourself permission to break away from the chaos within and without. Or simply take the time-out just to escape for a few minutes from the daily grind of kids, chores and other tasks that you've set out to do. Put it on your list of things-to-do if possible. 

4. Feed yourself well. Often, mothers are so busy loading laundry, washing dishes, responding to the kids' calls that they forget that they haven't even had breakfast and it's already a few minutes before lunch time. This is so true for me. Sometimes I forget I need to drink water even as I go around giving cups with water to my kids to drink. No wonder that a mother's fuse can grow so short.

5. Don't rob yourself of sleep. I am very guilty of this even as I'm typing. I have always seen the time when my kids are sleeping as time for me to do many chores and writing tasks that I couldn't do when the kids are awake, but I've realized how in the process I am sabotaging my own plan. So for now, this blogpost will have to wait to be finished in another time while I sleep.

Tomorrow I'll write about redeeming what we lost after we've lost our cool. Stay with me. At the mean time...

I can lie down and sleep soundly because you, Lord, will keep me safe.

(Psalm 4:8)

Good night! 

God is Not Done Yet

The birthday month is about to end. Another new month is raring to start. And yes, the snow is gone, the weeds have come. (I spent a whole day pulling weeds last Sunday that my hand hurts.)

I have reached a milestone in life. I'm 40. But at 40, I don't feel like I have arrived. Not yet. Actually, it feels more like I'm just beginning. Like, I am learning to softly close doors and walk in to where I'm finally feeling more at home. Things like I want to do and I want to be.

But I have a problem--- I can go on and on. I have a hard time finishing up what I have started.

I have been starting posts but unable to finish them, just as I have done with many writing projects. Now I wonder when I will get to be done with them... and get them posted/published.

But here's what I am certain.

He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ.

(Philippians 1:6)

I could end this post right now with an "Amen!", but that would be premature.

And so, even as I'm typing here, God is working. Hence, the mess as the renovation, uh, reformation is going on.

And as many ladies are familiar with, having a makeover done halfway is not the way to do the job. Just imagine, ladies, going home with only one side of your head sporting bouncy curls while the other side is limp as spaghetti. Or your barber, gentlemen, decided to quit at what he's been doing after he has shaved the hair behind your right ear and you went home with a totally unexpected look that even the dogs were barking at you on your way home. You don't want that.

I don't want it either. I don't want to be half-done. Because being half-done is not being done at all. So here I am at my big four-oh raring for what He has in store. And here's what I'm expecting... (and which, I am fervently praying I am on-the-process-of-getting now.)

Total Makeover!!!

1. ...of my selfish heart.

As someone has said, "Helping others is your best shot at scoring in the game of life." Service may not be so attractive to our world conditioned to seek what is comfortable and easy, but for those who seek to live the life God wants them--- growing and fruitful--- it is the only way to go. Jesus said, "If you give up your life for me, you will find true life." (Matthew 16:25).

But I have a selfish heart, carnal and egotistical. Only God can change it, only He can shape it after His own.

 All that He needs from me is to give my whole heart to Him and leave it there.

An inspired author wrote: "It is impossible for us, of ourselves, to escape from the pit of sin in which we are sunken. Our hearts are evil, and we cannot change them. "Who can bring a clean thing out of an unclean? not one." "The carnal mind is enmity against God: for it is not subject to the law of God, neither indeed can be." (Job 14:4; Romans 8:7). Education, culture, the exercise of the will, human effort, all have their proper sphere, but here they are powerless. They may produce an outward correctness of behavior, but they cannot change the heart; they cannot purify the springs of life. There must be a power working from within, a new life from above, before men can be changed from sin to holiness. That power is Christ. His grace alone can quicken the lifeless faculties of the soul, and attract it to God, to holiness" (White, E., Steps to Christ, 18).

2. ...of my relationships, starting with Him.

Oh, how we long to have wonderful relationships, without the tension and conflicts that often times come with it. But living in a world racked with sin and a body genetically modified with it, our relationships go, if not bad, then worst. And if we are in loving relationships, we are one of the fortunate ones... or simply, we have learned what it means to forgive.

Yes, forgiveness. We have to offer it everyday, just as we receive it daily. Jesus taught us to pray: "Forgive us our sins, just as we have forgiven those who have sinned against us." (Matthew 6:12). 

The first step to having a right relationship with God and man is forgiveness. "How shall a man be just with God? How shall the sinner be made righteous? It is only through Christ that we can be brought into harmony with God, with holiness; but how are we to come to Christ? Many are asking the same question as did the multitude on the Day of Pentecost, when, convicted of sin, they cried out, "What shall we do?" The first word of Peter's answer was, "Repent." (Acts 2:37, 38). At another time, shortly after, he said, "Repent, . . . and be converted, that your sins may be blotted out"
(Acts 3:19), (STC, 23)

But we wait too long. We wait for the right moment. We wait until we are good.

Come as you are. If you have wronged someone, don't ever think you can get away without making an apology. "If you see your sinfulness, do not wait to make yourself better. How many there are who think they are not good enough to come to Christ. Do you expect to become better through your own efforts? "Can the Ethiopian change his skin, or the leopard his spots? then may ye also do good, that are accustomed to do evil." (Jeremiah 13:23). There is help for us only in God. We must not wait for stronger persuasions, for better opportunities, or for holier tempers. We can do nothing of ourselves. We must come to Christ just as we are" (E. White, STC, 31).

And as He changes me, so does He change my relationships as I bring them to Him, whether my relationship with my husband, or my son, or my boss, or my students. Even with my MIL, with whom I thought I was making progress with by ignoring each other, then suddenly she wakes up or comes home and wants a fight... even that.

No, change doesn't start with us, it starts with the realization that we need something bigger than us, Someone who has the power to transform us.

If you are going through some rough, tumbly times that you just can't handle and makes you wonder that maybe, maybe you don't deserve a peaceful, harmonious life, DON"T MAKE IT AN EXCUSE to run away from God and into the arms of something that you may be sorry later. Run to Him. Plead with Him all the more. Imitate the persistence of that gentile woman, who sought healing for her demon-possessed daughter, and who kept pleading with Jesus even after He had to turn her away. She said, “Yes, Lord, yet even the little dogs eat the crumbs which fall from their masters’ table” (Matthew 15:27). And the Savior was amazed. He said, “O woman, great is your faith! Let it be to you as you desire.” And her daughter was healed from that very hour (v. 28).

Yes, come to Him and bring whatever it is that stops you from giving your heart to Him. He knows what to do with the demons inside us--- the addictions, the tendency to get distracted and wander, the troubles, the anxieties that beset us, and the storms. Yes, the storms that either will break us or cause us to cling desperately and faithfully to the Rock. Bring all to Him. He is not interested in our strength, but in our dependence on Him. He is our refuge and help.

God is our refuge and strength, 

A very present help in trouble. 

(Psalm 46:1)

And as I move on to the new season of my life, I invite you to journey on with me, as I hold on to His promise that He'll soften the rough edges in me, bring out the best of what He has given me, take out the dross, wash me, cleanse me, complete me. Only He can do that.

Now to Him who is able to keep you from stumbling,

And to present you faultless

Before the presence of His glory with exceeding joy,

To God our Savior,

Who alone is wise,

Be glory and majesty,

Dominion and power,

Both now and forever.

Amen.

(Jude 1:24, 25)

References:

White, E. G. (1892). Steps to Christ (STC). Mountain View, CA: Pacific Press Publishing Association

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My Story in a Nutshell: Celebrating Years of God's Goodness and Mercy
On Over-Grown Hair, Growing Old, and Living Forward
Getting a Sense of Direction

The Taste of Loneliness and The Antidote (Poetry)

The Taste of Loneliness

The taste of loneliness is such
a bitter pill refusing to budge
stays in place
on the tongue

a language I barely speak, of joy
felt, forgotten like rain in June
in a hot,
desert land

where no man is friend or foe
just that--- nothing. Indifferent:
dying, dying, gone
with ennui.

Kids, Temperament, Motivation and The Pattern

Misha is all for fun.

Even a child is known by his doings, whether his work be pure, and whether it be right.

Proverbs 20:11

A few days ago, I could almost smell summer in the air: bright sunshine, sweat, bicycle oil. Then two nights ago a snowstorm came bringing with it loads and loads of snow... and beautiful snowflakes spiraling in the air in the morning. And no electricity.

As school was cancelled, I was left with four kids without the help of modern devices. What to do?
I watched.

I watched the snowflakes. Beautiful, intricate in all it's design, then read about it. Fascinating.

I watched the kids in each of their own beautiful personalities trying to combat boredom in their own special way (as God has made them). Then blog about it. Extremely fascinating.

I looked like I was reading, but with all the activity going on, how can one even concentrate? This momma is on to another study, one that has begun since I had child #1. My lab goes like this...

5 Songs to Keep the Rhythm of Life

Music is a big part of life. Well, for me, anyway.

But there was a time I ignored it to avoid conflict. The rhythm of my life stood still. Oh, how dull it was. (And no, it didn't help to endear me to that one person.) I've learned from then on, not to compromise who I am and my life to other people's whims, much more my worship to my God. Because music and life, and all our creative gifts, come from Him. Though it could be used for something else, the whole of it is a means of worship when He is acknowledged and these gifts are dedicated to Him.

Through the years as I've grown, so has my appreciation for music and the experiences that people, who wrote them, go through. Today, I thought of sharing them with you. I have included a little bit of background of the songs and why these songs should at least be heard given the time one needs them. They are not in any kind of order.